Life Is Hard, But We Keep Moving Forward

Life can be really hard sometimes. Cancer is hard. Chemo is hard. And going through both? That’s a whole different level of difficulty. It’s hard on Hutton, and it’s hard on all of us as a family. We try to stay positive, but some days—and even some weeks—just feel really hard.

This past week was one of those times. Hutton was supposed to have chemo on Tuesday, but her bloodwork on Monday showed her hemoglobin was too low. So instead of chemo, we headed to UCLA for a blood transfusion.

A day of chemo or transfusion means an early start—out the door by 5:45 a.m. to make it to UCLA by 7:30 a.m., hoping traffic cooperates so we can get to the infusion center by 8 a.m. On Tuesday, we got lucky and were in and out quickly with minimal traffic—but that’s not usually the case! Normally, we hit a bunch of traffic at least one way. We were really hoping that the blood transfusion would boost her numbers enough for chemo on Friday, but unfortunately, her labs on Thursday still weren’t quite where they needed to be. So, her chemo was postponed to next week.

Hutton only has three rounds of chemo left, and we had hoped to be finished by September. This delay means that might not happen, but that’s okay—even if it’s hard to accept.

Lately, Hutton’s been having a tough time emotionally. Breakdowns have become a regular thing—sometimes multiple times a day. It’s heartbreaking to see her cry and be upset, especially when she can’t even explain why she feels sad. Sometimes it comes out of nowhere, like when she suddenly started crying about our dogs passing away—something that happened years ago. We know these emotions are side effects of the chemo, and we’re here to support her no matter what feelings come up.

Physical therapy is another emotional challenge. She often cries through at least half of her sessions, and as a parent, it’s tough to watch. But we also know PT is helping her. She needs to relearn how to walk, even when it’s difficult. She usually has PT twice a week, and we’re so lucky her physical therapist is absolutely amazing—kind, encouraging, and caring, like she’s part of our family. After a tough first session this week, Hutton totally crushed it in her second one! She’s learning to use crutches and was able to walk around and even go up and down our many stairs (and if you know our house, that’s no small feat). Seeing her take those steps with crutches brought tears to my eyes—it was beautiful to watch her regain her independence and confidence.

We’ve also been trying to get her into the pool because we know how great it is for her, but at first, she was hesitant. Part of that was fear of the unknown—wondering how her surgical leg would feel in the water or if she’d be able to swim. But yesterday, she surprised us all and decided to give it a try. She took it slow, easing in gently, and then swam for hours! Hutton has always loved being in the water, and seeing her joy and confidence return while swimming was truly incredible. Her smile and sparkle said it all—she was alive and thriving in that moment, and it was the best thing for all of us to see.

Hutton still has a long road ahead, with challenges and uncertainty. She has a PET-CT scan scheduled in August, and we’re asking for all the prayers and positive thoughts we can get. After her surgery, doctors still saw a few small cancer spots remaining, and we’re praying this scan shows they’re gone.

Thanks for being with us on this journey. Every step forward, no matter how hard, is a victory worth celebrating.